Listen to What You’re Listening To: Finesse — Bruno Mars

According to Billboard’s Top 100 Songs Charts, Bruno Mars’ song “Finesse” is at number three.

This song does not immediately seem as inherently problematic as last week’s song, “Boom!” However, there are some more subtle lyrics here that are cause for concern, especially considering Mars’ younger audience.

The concerning passage is:

Blame it on my confidence

Oh, blame it on your measurements

In the song, it’s hard to catch, but again, putting it in writing makes it a little more obvious.

• Bruno’s finesse is based off a personality trait.
• The unnamed female’s finesse is based off her measurements.

So: Finesse for a man has nothing to do with looks. Finesse for a woman is solely about looks.

But the song actually gets worse:

Fellas grab your ladies if your lady fine

Tell her she the one, she the one for life

Again, (and let’s just ignore the “grabbing” for a moment) the men are being told to interact with the women on the mere condition that the women are attractive — then she’s the one for life, but not if she isn’t.

Now, this isn’t inherently problematic. It’s a fact of life that men and women alike have to be attracted to someone who they will potentially spend their life with. But there’s an unfair standard here. If the man is confident, then he’s met the conditions. But if a woman hasn’t got the right measurements, then she has not met the conditions. Why are men not more explicitly measured by this same physical standard? Why are women with confidence not just seen to lack the necessary requirements if they fail to be “attractive,” but often that confidence is seen as a negative quality?

Yes, this is just a song. Yes, you could argue that it doesn’t really hold to reality. It’s just an “ideal night out.” But for whom? Does the woman in this song really enjoy the “grinding” as much as Bruno does? Where is her voice? Why does she not have a say?

This song is the third most-listened-to song this week. Is it any wonder where people get their perverted and skewed ideas of sexual relations from?